feisty

At the second center I worked at there was this little girl who was the most feisty girl I have ever known. She had opinions and let you know what they were. She had so much energy and was so full of spunk. She was one of those children that did not-and I mean did not- do anything she did not want to do. She was so much fun though. She was kind to everyone and she loved her older brother.

One day she was playing at the kitchen there in the dramatic play area of the room when he walked in with their mom. She saw him put the toy down, said hi to her brother, then walked over to him and put her arms up for him to pick her up. My co-teacher and I lost it. It was one of the cutest things we have ever seen and we laughed. It became a running joke between us and the brother. Whenever he'd come with mom to pick this little girl up we'd look at him and say, "Hi (brother's name)." He took it well.

One day she was climbing on the table and I kept going over to her and putting her on the floor and telling her that her feet belonged on the floor. One time after I did this I told her that next time I was going to use my angry voice. She started to climb back on the table and I started back over to where she was when another child got there first. This child looked at her said something in babble and then the little girl responded. The child that had gone over to her looked at me, pointed at me while telling her something. The little girl looked at me, looked at the other child then walked away. My co-teacher and I looked at one another and started to laugh.
I said, "I have no idea what just happened or what was said. I only know it had something to do with me." Then we did one of the many scans of the room we did  a day to make sure the children were okay. We were both sad when this little girl moved up to the two's room.

biting

At the first center I worked at I eventually took over a room after all three employees quit on the same day. The first month was rough as my co-workers and I taught them not to touch electric sockets and all kinds of other things they had been allowed to do that was unsafe when the other teachers were in the room. One of the things that was the hardest to stop was biting. It was difficult but after a month we went down from multiple bites a day to maybe once a week and as those children moved up to the next room and we got new children biting occurred around once a month.

I had a little girl in this room who was part of the new class after the other ones who moved up who were biting. She would bite at least once a day. After about two week of biting around once a day I started to shadow her so that I could not only prevent it but figure out why she was doing it. Turns out she was biting when she felt enclosed. Every time a lot of children were around her and she didn't see a way out of the crowd of children around her she would bite. I started to shadow her less but keep an eye on her and made sure no more than two or three children were around her at once. The biting lessened and then stopped unless I couldn't get to her on time and remove her from the situation in time.

This little girl wasn't the only child who bit that I've dealt with and what triggers the biting has varied. For this little girl it was enclosed spaces. For a little boy that bit it was because he was hungry. For another little boy it was because he had a cloth he used to bite on all the time and when the parents took it away so that he didn't get too attached, he started to bite other children instead. Some children bite because they were frustrated or were trying to communicate using their words, couldn't get them out so they bit. Some children did it because they were teething and it was a release of the pain.

With each situation I've dealt with it differently.  With the little boy who bit because he didn't have his cloth anymore to bite on I talked to the parents about bringing in another toy to help him feel the security the cloth did. With the boy who bit because he was hungry I broke the bread into bite size pieces for him and let him start eating on that while we got the rest of lunch ready. We did this with the whole class and it helped calm lunch time down. With the ones who bit because they got frustrated or didn't have the words yet to communicate I really started to help them gain their vocabulary and started teaching them to use their words to communicate. Each time the biting went down. One thing I did all across the board is right after they bit I would give them a teether and tell them to bite on it. This really helped those who were biting because they were teething. It helped relieve that pain and it always worked regardless of the reason the biting occurred.

Favoritism

I have only worked in one center where favoritism didn't exist. The administration was professional and so was the staff because it was expected and modeled. This was the best experience I've had in working in child care and I wish I had found it earlier than I did. I may have felt differently about working in the field and had a better career in it than I have.

The other two centers that I worked at, favoritism was part of the daily work environment. There was favoritism toward the staff from administration. It was done openly and everyone knew who the favorites were. These were the staff members who sat up front by the administration offices and talked to the director and assistant director almost all day. They had more of a say in the problems that occurred than others and these were the people who were always given the time off that was requested and never told no. This would be a reason why staff are not loyal to a company.

Favoritism has also occurred between staff and children or families. It was worst at the third center I worked at. It again was done openly and some were unprofessional enough to openly admit to not only staff but to the families themselves that their child/ family was their favorite. There were teachers at these centers who treated the children unequally and would sometimes be down right rude or exclude children from things. They treated the children differently and you could see it hurt their feelings. The administration would do nothing about it. This would be another reason why staff are not loyal to a company. Administration doesn't step up and fix the problems they have.

When children are excluded and treated differently this sends them a message that they are not as important or loved as another child and it's in my opinion wrong. This effects children's self esteem and self worth and it can cause irreparable damage. Yes, some children get in a little deeper than others and you have a stronger bond with them than you do other children, however, it doesn't give a teacher the right to treat them differently and to teach them that there are different rules for them than others. The children who are taught that there are different rules for them than others have a hard time when they enter 'the real world' because not everyone is going to give them the special treatment that teacher did. They all of a sudden have to follow the rules and sometimes these children grow up to be the people no one likes because they think their special and expect others to treat them like they are because teachers, family whoever treated them like they're special and taught them rules don't apply to them but instead other rules apply to them. It is in my opinion, a great disservice done to them. Their lives can end up being harder than they need to be all because they weren't treated with equality somewhere along the line. Favoritism hurts children.

rollin'

At the first center I worked at, they added another room onto the center and put the room I was working in, in that room. I worked with toddlers ages 12 months to 18 eighteen months. The room we were in before opened right out onto the playground. The room that was added on that we were moved to opened up onto the older children's playground (2-5 yrs). This meant we had to walk around the corner, walk by the side of the building, then turn the other  corner at the other end of the building to get to the playground. This in my opinion was not smart and I don't know what the director or owner was thinking. They had the children who either couldn't walk yet or who were still learning how to walk go the longest distance to the playground. They put the 2's classroom in our old classroom that opened up to our playground so now the 2's were in a room that opened to our playground and we were in a room that opened onto theirs. It made no sense to me.

For the first few months of being in this new classroom, every time we opened the door to go outside there was a little boy that rolled down the hill. We would get the children around the corner and this little boy would lose his balance and roll down the hill. This happened on the way to the playground and the way back in. My co-teachers and I saw the humor in it, but we also were consistently asking that a fence be put up so that it didn't continue. We eventually made sure that one of us had this little boy's hand whenever it was time to go outside so that he wouldn't roll down the hill. We also  eventually got the fence, but even then it was still hard to get the children to and from the playground. If the teachers of the older classes were outside some of them would help us get the children around the corner.
The center eventually got a new director and she didn't like that we were back where we were and that the playground walk was so long. I left the center shortly after the new director took over so I don't know if they eventually moved the class again. I hope so...

Love doesn't have a color

At the first center that I worked at there was a little girl who was 'my baby.' I call her this because she was a child in the class who was really attached to me. She wouldn't let anyone else put her down for her nap, help her, or console her when she got hurt or do anything else for her. I loved this little girl! One day, at the end of the day when I was getting ready to go home, she started to follow me out the door. The director got my attention and I had to wait to walk out the door until her Mom had her. I loved all the children in my classroom but sometimes some of them just get in a little deeper than the others did and I had a stronger bond with these children than I did with the others. The bond I had with this little girl has happened with many children over the years. Sometimes they are girls and sometimes they are boys. I can't explain why the bond is stronger with some children than it is with others, particularly when you spend the same amount of time with each one, each day, but for some reason the bond is just stronger with some of them than with others. Despite having a stronger bond with some children than others I've treated the children with equality. The ones that I had a stronger bond with didn't get away with something the other children didn't. Consequences were the same for everyone. This little girl happened to be a little black girl and some of the teachers had a problem with the bond that we had. For little children though, they don't see race and they understand that love doesn't have a color.

So funny!

At one of the centers that I worked at there was a bench in the front of the window that the children sat on to play or stood on to look out the window. Occasionally, I would sit on it and watch the children play. One day I was sitting on this bench when a little boy came and sat beside me. As he sat down he put his arm around me and let out a really big sigh. My co-teacher and I laughed so hard. My co-teacher looked at me and said, "Taryn, I thought you said you didn't have a man in your life?!" This made me laugh even harder. I don't usually laugh in front of the children but I couldn't help it this time. It was so funny and I will never forget it! I looked at me co-worker when I stopped laughing and said, "Now we know what Daddy does when he sits next to Mommy."

parents

Sometimes parents are hard to deal with. Sometimes they even make a person uncomfortable. At the second center I worked at there was a dad who made the staff uncomfortable. He would rub up against the staff members as he walked by them, touch them inappropriately, walked around with his chest out like he was 'the man,' etc. One day he had come in to pick his child up. His child had a fever and I had called to let the parents know and ask them to come pick her up. Since dad worked closest to the center he came to pick her up. As I was telling him about her morning he kept advancing on me. I would step back and he would move forward. I finally asked him to please stay where he was because he was making me uncomfortable. He "apologized" and tried to blow it off.

Right after this my co-teacher who was outside with her primary children while I was inside doing the activity for the day opened the door and asked if we were ready for them to come in. The children were getting cold. I told her to go ahead and come inside and looked at her like 'please hurry.' Once the dad had left she asked me what happened and I told her. I then called up front and asked the director to come back to the room and told her. She was very exasperated and said, "I'm getting tired of this guy." By now she had had months of us complaining about him. Two or three days later when I walked into work he was in the office with the director. Later she came in and informed all of us that she had just given the family a two week notice to find new child care. The child was actually only there for about another week before she was gone.

FYI to parents- sometimes your behavior makes the staff really uncomfortable. By the way the staff are sometimes married and even if they aren't you are. We've met the wife!!