Bubbles

There are some parents who raise their children in a bubble. Sometimes this bubble is really big and it leads to the children learning to fear the world. These are the parents who expect their child's caregiver to stand over them all day long and prevent them from getting hurt in any way or even hold them all day long so that nothing ever happens to them. The thing is though, that not only is this harmful for the child but in a day care center it can't happen. There are other children who need to be taken care of and sometimes even though an adult is right there a child can fall so fast you can't catch them. Bumps, bruises and scratches are going to happen to children as they grow up. There is no way to prevent this, although most of the time you can prevent the severity of the injury.

Everyone knows you need to be careful of your head especially when hitting it because it can cause damage. However, most of the bumps and bruises a child will get on their head will never need more than ice or your basic first aid. If more is needed you know that immediately. All centers have what the parents want done in these cases in the child's file (I have only seen once when this needed to happen and a child hurt themselves bad enough to have to call an ambulance and the child taken to the ER). Like I said if it's this bad you know immediately.

I had a parent who was raising their child in a bubble and expected us as the teachers to hover over her child all day long and despite the fact that we constantly told her we couldn't and why, she still expected it. There was one day her child fell and bumped his head (remember toddlers are still learning to walk and obtain balance so they fall a lot) so I got the ice pack to put on it and he was sitting with one of the teachers. I got the parents information and was on my way to call the mom. I was walking down the hallway when I saw her coming and I said, "Oh I was just on my way to call you." I proceeded to tell her what happened.  I got as far as bumped his head when she said, "He bumped his head!" then took off running down the hallway to the classroom. I"m not kidding she ran down the hallway to the classroom. The director saw all of this so she came with me into the room.

When I got there she was holding her child like he had not been taken care of all day long, cradling him like he was going to die. She started yelling at me about why I had let him fall and why wasn't I watching him, and why didn't I stop him from falling and how bumps on the head can be serious and cause brain damage.

The director got her to calm down and looked at the child's forehead. It was red and you could tell he was going to have a bump but that was all. She asked me what happened and I told her what happened to cause him to fall and bump his head. The director took the parent into her office and talked to her and got her to calm down and then came back and told me and my co-teachers what happened. The parent wanted the piece of furniture he bumped his head on removed from the room. She explained that it couldn't be because certain furniture had to be in the room to meet state standards for the center to be open. The parent eventually left the center and got a nanny.

The thing is even a nanny can't prevent a child from ever getting hurt. It's going to happen. A child can't develop the skills they need to when placed in a bubble and everything expected to be prevented. They don't learn things because we learn from our mistakes and bad choices and if these are always prevented the child doesn't grow and develop like they need to. Am I for preventing accidents particularly ones to the head? Yes. However, at some point or another a child will hit their head on something hard enough to cause a bump or bruise or both.

What's important is for the parent not to overreact like this parent did. Staff in a center are trained in CPR and first aid and know how to treat injuries. Trust them to take care of your child or it will be hard to develop a relationship with them if one ever is.